Showing posts with label Random. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Random. Show all posts

4.24.2015

Healing


I am wrapping up a 15-week inner healing program, which has started to bring into focus to some of these things God has been doing in my life. Bringing healing and clarity and freedom from some of the shame in my life. Healing broken relationships. Creating healthy boundaries. Extending forgiveness to others and myself. And finding my own voice again – as well as the courage to use it.

I’m single. (I am sure a lot of you knew that. But there are enough of you I have talked to recently that seemed totally shocked when you found that out that I thought I would clear the air. A surprising number of people in my life have told me recently that they “totally thought you were married!” So…just to clear the air, I’m not.)

And I haven’t even dated anyone in about two years, when the dream I was dating abruptly ended things with me in an email. I think he ripped part of my heart out in the process. I am not one that easily trusts or embraces vulnerability – but he made it easy. And I really did think he was perfect for me. I also think I wrongly associated some of the work God was doing in my life with his presence at that precise moment in my journey. He brought a lot of insight to the darkness I was experiencing, gave me new language and new literature and helped me reach the surface again so I didn't feel like I was drowning anymore. So when he walked away, I was left standing perplexed and have since resisted wanting/seeking/trusting love in any sort of way for quite a while.  And I wandered around confused. Trying to find myself again and who I thought I was and what I feel I am worthy of.

It has been a longer road than I would have liked. But God has brought me to some beautiful places. It took wandering through the wilderness to break me of some of the broken identity I had been living with. And to figure out that it was God all along that had been walking with me and processing my brokenness, I just put all my hope and feelings in this more tangible man. It is frustrating that God uses the wilderness in that way – but he always has. The Israelites had to wander through the wilderness for many years, to break their identity as slaves. The first thing God commanded them to do was practice Sabbath. Because slaves never get a Sabbath – their worth is in their work, what they produce, their ability to bring about an end product. And I was putting my worth in all of the wrong things. Placing my identity in what others thought. I LIKED God, a lot actually, but it was a painful process to go through to realized that I didn't actually LOVE God (more on that later!)

That’s partially what renewing this blog has been about. Trusting my healing - trusting my voice. Having the courage to share my thoughts and opinions and being vulnerable enough to even share the stupid stuff. To share my experiences again. To wander with God again. And realize that maybe a bit of it just might be relatable. 


5.24.2013

Open Letter to Travelocity



I work for an amazing company, Fuller Theological Seminary. We have the great privilege of working with and for ministry leaders from all over the world. One such leader is a pastor and seminary professor from Myanmar. In order to be the best professor and pastor he can be he has applied for the Doctor of Ministry program at Fuller. 

We were able to find this pastor a full scholarship for this first course here on campus. A generous and gracious church has covered all his expenses: flight, housing, food, tuition, books - it is a really beautiful thing.

So our office has begun making arrangements to bring him to campus. We booked a flight with you, Travelocity, from Myanmar to Los Angeles for him. A few hours after booking the flight we were contacted via email letting us know it was canceled. 

We called you to inquire as to why the flight had been canceled. After one of my colleagues was on hold with your customer service for one hour and thirty four minutes, you informed us that the passengers name was not acceptable. You see, he only has one name. No first name, only a family name. So when booking the ticket we put in "First Name Unknown" and then his Last Name. My colleague inquired "am I not able to use your service if the passenger does not have an American name?" to which your customer service representative replied, "If they do not have a first and last name, the bank will not allow them to book a ticket."

We are paying for his ticket as the accredited graduate school supporting his studies, so I do not understand why the bank should be an issue. We have a copy of his passport verifying he only has one name - why is it that you cannot complete a simple transaction allowing a citizen from Myanmar to use your service to fly to America?

It baffles me that in today's world we still make things so inaccessible to those who do things differently than us. 

So we booked the flight through Expedia. It took approximately 34 seconds and in the amount of time it took me to write you this letter we already got the confirmation of the ticket. I am glad to see that some companies are willing to work with various cliental from around the world. Thank you, Expedia, I will be using you a lot more in the future.

Sincerely,
Julia

10.17.2012

Changed My Mind

Oops, I changed my mind, but Obama and Romney [and insert every other politician here] aren't allowed to....


There is one thing (yes, only one) I still don't understand about politics. How are human beings NOT allowed to change their mind? Do you know how many times throughout my life I have changed my mind about issues and how many more times I plan to change it again?! It is called MATURITY people. I would actually be frightened if our political leaders were so closed minded that they NEVER EVER EVER changed their minds on anything ever.  

10.15.2012

Potty Talk

I've heard people wonder what goes on in the ladies restroom when we all run in there together to powder our noses and freshen up......so I thought I'd share the conversation I overheard last night as I was in the ladies room with a bunch of women at a banquet I was attending.

Lady 1: Barb...you will never guess what happened today. I went to Target and did ya know, the four pack of panties I was going to buy was TEN DOLLARS! TEN!!! I was at K-Mart just last month and it was only $4.99.

Lady 2: Mmmmm Hmmmm

Lady 1: I went straight up to that cashier and told them that was criminal. Just criminal

Lady 2: Mmmmm Hmmmm

Lady 1: And do you know what she said? "well, maybe you should shop at K-Mart"

Lady 2: Mmmmm

Lady 1: I guess Imma have to. That's criminal. TEN DOLLARS for panties. And not the fancy ones. Four of those little cotton ones.

So, I guess, my point is, you don't have to be that curious cause it is not that interesting. Also, don't buy your panties at Target.

2.27.2012

underachiever

so, what did you do last night?
me & america: "drank a little wine, watched a little TV, hung out with some people"
danieljames: "won an oscar"

when your friend wins an oscar - it really makes you feel like you should be doing more with your life.

congratulations, dan and miles and all you undefeated peeps!
and all of you other regular boring people - go watch "undefeated" and enjoy the sweet sweet music.

2.17.2012

An Open Letter to Charter Communications


You are, quite simply, extremely annoying. I appreciate your internet service, I really do. And I think you provide great rates and good reliable service. But when it comes to every other area of who you are, how you relate to your cliental and your customer service, you are terrible. I have never interacted with another company that has made me feel more harassed.  If I wanted cable and telephone or any other service that you offered, believe me, I WOULD LET YOU KNOW. There are two main issues that I have with you.

First, you call me three to four times a day - sometimes beginning at 6:45a. This does not make me any more likely to solicit said services from you. You call me from different telephone numbers, and different area codes, trying to trick me into answering the phone. And if you do succeed in making me pick up my phone, your customer service representatives will never let me off the phone even after explicitly telling them 6 to 34,567,890 times I do not want to make any changes to my plan. It has come to the point where I will not pick up any phone numbers that I do not recognize for fear of being harassed by your company. This has resulted in me missing some very important and exciting calls from overseas friends. Is that your fault? Not necessarily - but you aren't making things easier. 

Second, I sincerely think you hate mother nature. The number of letters that you send me marked "VERY IMPORTANT INFORMATION" that are the exact same thing as your phone calls just trying to get me to spend more money with you, is outrageous. I could have a bonfire once a month with the amount of paper I throw away that you send to my mailbox. And for the record, trying to get me to purchase cable, is not VERY IMPORTANT INFORMATION. I am lucky I have not thrown away one of your bills yet in the midst of all the junk you mail to me.

All this to say, Dearest Charter, please stop harassing your customers. We know what great service you provide. That is why we are with you. And if we ever decide we want more if it - we'll come to you. Trust us, we know that you are there. But right now you seem a little desperate and needy, and that just pushes us away even more.

Sincerely,
Julia

1.31.2012

going home

Going home is weird. 
Or is it coming home?
I am never really sure how I am supposed think about it.

I grew up in Illinois. Most of the first 21 years of my life were spent there. So I guess you could call that "home" even though I now live elsewhere. I still love the feeling of exiting off I-90 onto East State Street. Turning left onto Perryville and looking around me to see all the changes that have taken place since I've last been there. Turning into my neighborhood and then eventually into my driveway to see the warm glow of the lights and heat radiating from my childhood home. Walking in those doors is still so familiar and never ceases to put a smile on my face. I love cuddling up on the couch by the fireplace or watching a football game with my dad or a chick flick with  my mom or just sitting in the kitchen while we take turns cooking meals and then eating them together. Or family game nights, those are my favorite. No one in the world can make me laugh like my family. 

I guess going home is really therapy for me. It is the place I can truly be myself. I don't have to worry about what's next, where I am going in life, who I am or how I am perceived. I am with those who know me best and love me at my worst. I am comfortable. I am content. 

But it is also weird. Because you have to run into those people that you have not seen in six years and have that same conversation over and over again "what are you doing now? are you married? blah blah blah" and then you have to ask the reciprocating questions even though, let's be honest, 90% of the time you don't really care. And part of you feels judged and insecure no matter how happy you are with your life, because it is not normal to be single and vote democratic. So you start to avoid these people and the places you might see them, and you begin to just hang out with the same three people over and over again (two of which live with you in LA).

So I guess there is always part of me that is excited to return to California. Where I struggle to pay rent and figure out my life and go on terrible dates and sit in front of a computer 40 hours a week. I mean, I have a lot of really great stuff going for me too (insert conversation about the weather), but life can be hard at times. Sometimes I think it would be easier to pick it all up and go back to Illinois where I am known and where it is comfortable and where eating hotdish every night is NORMAL, PEOPLE. 

But something holds me here. Because California has become home. Because someone once told me that home is wherever you are. So I make my home in a tent in Yosemite or in an orphanage in Chihuahua or in a hotel in Nepal or in a back house in California. Because location is not what makes something "going home" - I am what makes something home, and the people I choose to make company with is what makes something home. Where I choose to invest in community and life and love is what makes something home. 

6.21.2011

pastors lives and christian wives

Conversation in the office today:

Guy: "How long has it been since you've blogged"
Me: "awhile. my problem is i need prompts. i don't do well just coming up with a topic."
Guy: "Blog about why chicks who play the bagpipes make better christian wives" 
Me: "that is the worst topic I've ever heard of"
Other Guy: "I think you meant why LADIES who play the bagpipes make better PASTORS wives"
Me: "cause then they can play at al the funerals?"
Other Guy: "and lead worship"

…so this is my blog about it.

10.22.2010

E

I like to spell gray with an E.

grey.

What's so wrong with that?

8.25.2010

IDL's

I must have been doing something wrong (like procrastinating to the very last week to finish up all my assignments that were supposed to be spread over a 10-week period) - but IDL's never looked this peaceful and meditative for me.









How did she get internet access at the beach? And wasn't she worried sand would get in there? And how did she actually TYPE her 15 page paper with the laptop balanced on her knees? Did she listen to all 20 lectures with posture that impressive? I bet the sun got hot - wasn't she worried her laptop would get taken when she went to jump in the ocean for a cool-off? And how can she even see her laptop with the sun shining so bright? Get her some sunglasses!

5.07.2010

Mother's Day Idea

Just got an email from NASCAR.

There are not many mothers that this would work for...but I hope I am this kind of mother some day.

Make Mom's Special Day Unforgettable

To celebrate Mother's Day, Auto Club Speedway is offering an incredible package for the Pepsi 400 that offers a little something for everyone at an unbelievable price.

- Pepsi 400 Reserved Grandstand Seat
(rows 1-23, turn 1 sections 93-119)
- Lot 3 Parking (closest to your seats)
- Race day treat for mom: Sprinkles CupcakeAdults - $34.00
Children (12 and under) - $19.00

HOW TO PURCHASE
By Phone: 800-944-RACE (7223)
In Person: At the Auto Club Speedway ticket office
So...thought I'd pass it on if anyone is looking for a last minute gift idea.

11.05.2008

Redemption song

From the "Call + Response" Documentary. If you haven't seen it yet - GO!

2.18.2008

A Tribute to Shanta

There is a woman that I love, admire and respect more highly than most I have every come in contact with. Besides being one of the most loving and giving people I have ever met - she has the best laugh I've ever heard!!

I'd love to share with you Shanta's story so you can share, in part, my love and awe for her. I got this write-up of Shanta's story (literally, word for word...I am totally stealing this) from my amazing and wonderful friend, Dawnette. It was actually from her old blog so I can't give her proper credit by connecting you to it - but know that she is the one that was amazingly articulate in putting this together and remembering these details. And now, in D's words...

Shanta has been life and breath and love and peace for countless women (and men) in Nepal. I got to hear her testimony at each speaking engagement...

As a child, she was one of 5 kids born to her folks. Because of lacking medical care, three of her older siblings, two girls and a boy, died within 15 days of each other. In Nepal, sons are considered imperative to have. It is the sons who are responsible for caring for their ailing parents, and eventually providing the cremation for them when they die. It is a belief within Hinduism that without a son to do these things, one will not attain heaven. So when his only son died, Shanta's father began to mercilessly beat her mother and tried to kick her and the remaining two girls out of the house. He relented and let them stay, but he married another woman, moved her into the house, and when Shanta was 12 he gave her away in marriage to a man many years her senior.

In her marriage family, Shanta was again mistreated. The man who took her as wife also had another wife, and Shanta was definitely the subordinate one in the family. Shanta's in-laws mistreated her as well. In Nepal, it being a Hindu country and a country of strong caste-system, if you associated with someone of a lesser caste you could lose your own caste. Shanta's birth family was Brahman ~ the highest caste. And within that caste level, they were of the highest group: a Priest family. She married into another Brahman family.

In that house she found a big brown book ~ it said "Holy Bible" on it. She would sneak it into her basket each day before going out to cut grass or collect water. Her uncle had taught her to read, and had told her you always start a book at the beginning. So every day for a month Shanta read this book....but she'd start back at chapter one each day! So within that month she only ever read chapters 1-4 of Genesis! When she read that Adam had lived 930 years, she thought "I am only 12 years old - I have many years left to live - I don't need to read this book right now!" After a month of reading it, she set it aside and didn't pick up a Bible again for over 12 years.

At one point, her in-laws began selling milk to a group of missionaries. Shanta was given the task of delivering that milk. One day a missionary invited her in for tea ~ she'd never had tea, so she accepted the invitation. Friends, who knew she'd gone into this missionary's home, went back to her in-laws and told them she'd "associated" with the missionaries (who are of no caste). As a result, the family stripped her of her caste, and for nine years would not even allow her into the kitchen for fear that her touching something there would render it "unclean" since she was now of no caste. She was forbidden to enter the kitchen for NINE YEARS.

She suffered much cruelty over the course of the 12 or 13 years she was with her husband. She cried often, and constantly wondered if she might find some peace on the other side of the hills she saw each day. Finally, at age 25 she left. She went out to cut grass one day, and with the grass-cutting knife in her hand, and only the dress she was wearing, she headed for the hills and ended up in Kathmandu.

In the city she got word that the missionary she'd once known was asking about her. She met up with this woman and asked about the Big Book. The missionary told her she could find that book at a house not far away - a red house. Shanta found that house, and inside were 6 Nepali people who were starting a church together. She went inside and sat in the corner, listening as they worshiped and read from Scripture. She joined them week after week, and soon came to find the peace and love she'd ached for all her life ~ found that in the person of Jesus Christ. She also met Min, the man who would become her loving husband and father to their children.
Before long she realized she wanted to help other people, but that she needed training. Youth With A Mission offered a Discipleship Training Course and made room for her to take the course. After the 5-month program she set aside three days to fast and pray, asking the Lord for a vision for ministry. She'd known a girl with polio in her village, and in her heart she so wanted to minister to handicapped children. Three times she asked the Lord to give her a vision for handicapped kids....and three times the Lord said no ~ He had a different plan. He wanted her to work with the used and abused girls of Nepal. Twice Shanta said "No Lord, I want handicapped kids". Finally, she relented and gave herself wholly to the vision the Lord gave her.

She and Min had nothing to their name. They borrowed the equivalent of $15 to rent a two-room place so they could begin to bring girls into their home to minister to. The first girl they got, Shanta found dumped by the roadside. Her body was so tormented that maggots had already begun to eat at her. Shanta brought her home and cleaned her up and began to BE the love of Jesus to this girl.

Not long later, Shanta was in the hospital for a surgery. The hospital knew she was running a home for girls, and they approached her about a girl they had in their care. This young woman had been in the brothels 22 months, and became the first person in Nepal diagnosed HIV+. Because she was the first, the hospital literally had nothing they could do for her. She was sick with pneumonia and tuberculosis, as well as a few STD's. She was so sick she couldn't even sit up. The hospital gave her 6 weeks to live. Shanta argued that she needed medical care, but the hospital said either Shanta would take her or they would cast her out into the streets ~ people were beginning to avoid the hospital because of this woman's HIV and they just couldn't afford that. So Shanta brought her home.

Her name is Bruna, and that was 17 years ago. Bruna has NEVER had any kind of medical care for ANY of her ailments....and she is now the longest-living HIV+ person in Nepal without medical care! Bruna is also the most effective counselor Shanta's ministry has. She's been there. She knows. She has a voice none of us will ever have. Bruna has stayed with the Peace Rehabilitation Center all these years, and God has used her life in mighty ways.

There are endless stories yet to be told about Shanta, her time here, the PRC and its ministry, but those will have to wait for a subsequent entry. I pray as you read this, you take some time to simply ponder the greatness of God and His plan for our lives. Three times in Shanta's first marriage she tried to take her own life. She still weeps as she tells her story. Her life was horrific. I don't claim to understand why the horrific happens....I only have a firm belief that God is present there. And that He does have a plan. I rarely know what it is...I just feel mighty blessed, in the deepest sense, when I get a glimpse of the plan in action. I felt that a lot the past two weeks.

Shanta says she knows God had a bigger plan for her. And again, she weeps as she recognizes day after day how His vision reflects all that. It unfolds on a very consistent basis as she meets each girl who enters her home or receives PRC training.

I said it before: If you've not had the chance to meet Shanta, I hope you will sometime. I hope you get to sit with her, drink tea with her, hear her heart and enjoy silence in her presence. It really is a beautiful thing.

Shanta is beautiful.

2.13.2008

One Weeks Worth of Food

One Week's Worth of Food Around Our Planet

This is something I came across on a friend's blog, I also found it at the link above. Interesting - and so many implications. Thoughts??? The pictures say it all:

Japan: The Ukita family of Kodaira City Food expenditure for one week: 37,699 Yen or $317.25

Italy: The Manzo family of Sicily Food expenditure for one week: 214.36 Euros or $260.11 Favorite foods: fish, pasta with ragu, hot dogs, frozen fish sticks

Germany: The Melander family of Bargteheide Food expenditure for one week: 375.39 Euros or $500.07

United States: The Revis family of North Carolina Food expenditure for one week: $341.98 Favorite foods: spaghetti, potatoes, sesame chicken

Mexico: The Casales family of Cuernavaca Food expenditure for one week: 1,862.78 Mexican Pesos or $189.09 Favorite foods: pizza, crab, pasta, chicken

Poland: The Sobczynscy family of Konstancin-Jeziorna Food expenditure for one week: 582.48 Zlotys or $151.27 Family recipe: Pig's knuckles with carrots, celery and parsnips

Egypt: The Ahmed family of Cairo Food expenditure for one week: 387.85 Egyptian Pounds or $68.53 Family recipe: Okra and mutton

Ecuador: The Ayme family of Tingo Food expenditure for one week : $31.55 Family recipe : Potato soup with cabbage

Bhutan: The Namgay family of Shingkhey Village Food expenditure for one week: 224.93 ngultrum or $5.03 Family recipe: Mushroom, cheese and pork

Kuwait: The Al Haggan family of Kuwait City Food expenditure for one week: 63.63 dinar or $221.45
Family recipe: Chicken biryani with basmati rice

China: The Dong family of Beijing Food expenditure for one week: 1,233.76 Yuan or $155.06
Favorite foods: fried shredded pork with sweet and sour sauce

United States: The Caven family of California Food expenditure for one week: $159.18
Favorite foods: beef stew, berry yogurt sundae, clam chowder, ice cream

Mongolia: The Batsuuri family of Ulaanbaatar Food expenditure for one week: 41,985.85 togrogs or $40.02 Family recipe: Mutton dumplings

Great Britain: The Bainton family of Cllingbourne Ducis Food expenditure for one week: 155.54 British Pounds or $253.15 Favorite foods: avocado, mayonnaise sandwich, prawn cocktail, chocolate fudge cake with cream

Chad: The Aboubakar family of Breidjing Camp Food expenditure for one week: 685 CFA Francs or $1.23 Favorite foods: soup with fresh sheep meat

11.23.2007

For Richer or Poorer

This was written by a beautiful young lady, Karlynn, after her first experience in Nepal. She went as one of my students the summer of 2002.

-------------------------------------------------------------

I am an American, my fellow American’s wouldn’t consider me wealthy, but at my current resident, I am of great prestige. I’ve always wanted that. Unfortunately, here in Nepal, money has a stench greater than the lack of.
A dark salesman tries to teach me a lesson. He waves his product and renders me guilty for not purchasing.
A flock of Tibetan women wave their thick heavily jeweled hands and flail their sharply accented English in a mad attempt to make the almighty buck.
A heard of children tug on my clothing “you have sweet?” Their soiled mouths cry out. I didn’t ask for this!
This was not in the brochure! I…I…didn’t ask for…for a lesson. Suddenly, I’m vowed to poverty, and it only cost me three easy payments of $999.99 and my youth pastors signature!
My windy weeps of worthless unwillingness register whining. “Oh Poor Me! Oh pity me! My pain is so great and that of the unbearable.”
OR sometimes I am too quick to judge. “I would never cheat stupid Americans out of their money.
OR I would teach my children manners.
OR I would be reluctant to…
Or – Or – Or…
I saw a starving child today. Not a poor dirty child, but a starving child. His little belly hung like that of a bloated pregnant woman’s. His face was crusted with sickness. His eyes were yellow, his fingernails were speckled. An urgency to get this kid some food came over me. But you can’t give a starving child blow pops and fruit snacks.
I found myself disgusted wit his mother. Why wasn’t she getting work? How did she get cigarettes but not food? Where is her husband?
But I’ve never had to survive the off-season, when tourism is low and rains are high. I’ve never had to sell cheap jewelry. I’ve never had to decide between cigarettes and food.
I didn’t ask for this! I didn’t want to learn a lesson! Not this lesson! I didn’t ask to get this knowledge – I didn’t know what I was trading!
And when I get back to my hometown, I’ll use this little trick I learned.
“Madame, Madame? You remember me? I have something for you. Come look. Looking free. We swap, yes?”
You give me your ignorance, and I’ll finally be rid of this knowledge.

6.04.2007

Pop vs. Soda vs. Coke

It is finals week here - I don't have much time to write anything of significance. So I leave with you this little bit of fascinating information. I am a minority in my state...and county (yes, you can even check your county!) Someone spent a lot of time on this and I think they deserve some recognition.
So....what do you call it? And while we are at it - if you are one of those "other" people...what the heck IS other...bubbly? beverage with gas? ...I don't get it.

Check It Out Here!